Chaplain on the Other Side of the Rail

The saga of phase 2 and a self discovery continues. This is not been all that good a day. That’s a shame, because it’s really been a good week, almost 2 weeks. I’ve been more active. Nothing like back to baseline, but more active. In fact, I had had several days in a row where I thought I was doing pretty well and Karen thought I was doing pretty well. Which is why it was really disappointing when I got up this morning and wasn’t going to make it to church. I prepared to last night. I hoped to this morning. And 10 minutes trying to help out with getting some exercise for Angel just took it all out of me. I might’ve been strong enough to drive to church. I would not have functioned well there. Since I’m really the music leader in this small congregation, it would not have been missed. So, close to tears, I admitted I wasn’t going to make it to church. This is still part of adjusting and understanding what I am and am not sufficiently resilient to do. When I feel good, I can walk w...

 It has been another month, and we are well into phase 2. And this is a good time to communicate. It’s a good time to communicate because it’s been a good day. Since my last post, I had a fair number of bad days. I have been struck more than before by fatigue and poor resilience. I simply don’t snap back the way I used to. It doesn’t help that the weather here has been uncommonly, hot and humid. I have always found that being out in the sapped me somewhat, but right now being out in the sun for more than a few minutes drains me beyond all expectation. For a long time, we would say that Karen with her concerns needed to come in after an hour in the sun, and then I could continue for another hour and a half. That’s not true anymore. At least as hot as it is, I need to come in at an hour, if not sooner. I’ve also lost weight. I’ve lost about 20 pounds since I started my regime. Between the weight loss and the exhaustion, last week I had about high-low point. I called to talk to my...